Disclaimer
This is a parody and satire site. It is not affiliated with Kim Kardashian, her law career, or any actual law firm. All characters, services, and testimonials are fictional. If you thought this was real, you probably need an attorney of your own.
Kim Kardashian, Esq.
Justice Never Looked This Good Naked. My Body. One Hell of a Closing Argument.
FAKE
Objection? Overruled. My thong sustained.
I didn’t just pass the bar — I bent over it. Justice doesn’t have to be blind… especially when she’s rocking stilettos. I’m the attorney who puts the oral in oral arguments, and the briefs in lace.
- Hung Jury Defense
- Because no jury stays hung after I strut in.
- Motions in Limousine
- I don’t file motions in court, I file them in the backseat.
- Cross-Examinations
- Positioned every way imaginable.
- Discovery Phase
- Clothes off, facts out.
- Client Privileges
- And I mean all privileges.
- Appeals Court
- The only thing hotter than my briefs are my appeals.
- Testimonials
- She got me off… in court, and then again after.” – Satisfied Defendant
- Her oral arguments were the best I’ve ever had.
- Hung Jury Member
- Better than a conjugal visit.
- Prisoner 23741
- LSAT
- Lick, Suck, Ass, Tits" exam.
- BAR Exam
- Bend And Ride.
- Torts
- The Kinky Stuff.
Course Catalog
- Contracts
- Getting It in Writing (And in Bed).
- Criminal Law
- Guilty Until She Screws You Innocent.
- Evidence
- Photos, Sexts, and Nudes.
- Ethics
- Don’t Ask.
Merchandise
- I’ll subpoena your pants.
- No gag order can stop this gag reflex.
- The only briefs I wear are crotchless.
- The only briefs I wear are crotchless.
- Contempt of court? Honey, I cum in court.
- Justice served raw, with no protection.
- I’ll plea bargain your ass… literally.
- Oral arguments that make you forget the verdict.
- All rise? You already did.
- Strict liability? Baby, I don’t do protection.
- I specialize in pro boner cases.
DISCLAIMER
- This is a parody and satire site. It is not affiliated with Kim Kardashian, her law career, or any actual law firm. All characters, services, and testimonials are fictional. If you thought this was real, you probably need an attorney of your own.